Daily Sufficient Grace

This past week, a pastor friend and his wife lost their newborn Daughter. Many years ago, I experienced a similar event with the unexpected loss of my infant Son. Even though it's been several years and God has healed many of the wounds of the past, their loss brought back some pain and hurt that I lived through so many years ago. I felt sorrowful for them and can understand some of the pain they went through, are going through, and will go through.

I had many questions years ago as I was just beginning my years in ministry. "Why would you allow such a tragic thing as this happen to me Lord, after all I've devoted my life to serving You?" Through the years, the Lord has revealed some of the answers to me, but there are many things that are still unresolved. I know however, that I will be getting answers directly from Him in the future, so I can have comfort in that. I also know that my Son went directly into the arms of God and has been with Him in heaven ever since. Selfishly I miss him and would love to have him around me, but I do understand that God's plans and my plans don't always go hand in hand and that as a Christian, I have to accept all that God has for me even though not everything He has for me is something I particularly want. However, I only know part of the plan, not all of it.

Life changed dramatically for me since those days, but that's a story for another day. One thing that hasn't changed is God. Even though I fail Him, He continues to love me. There is a song from a few years ago that better puts into words how grateful we should be as Christians to have a God that understands our weaknesses and failures and is willing to put all that aside and accept us. I have failed miserably at almost everything I've ever tried in life. However, no matter how down I get because of my failures or how high I get because of my rare accomplishments, God still loves me and takes care of me even though (in my opinion & others)I'm not worth His time. He always is there to provide grace, mercy, and healing to us.

*** Grace ***

My heart is so proud.
My eyes are so unfocused.
I see the things You've done through me, as great things I have done.
And now You gently break me, and I cry just like a baby.
You hold me as my Father, and mold me as my Maker.

And I ask You How many times will You pick me up.
When I keep on letting You down?
And each time I will fall short of Your glory,
How far will forgiveness abound?
And You answer, "My child, I love you,
And as long as you're seeking My face,
You'll walk in the power of My daily sufficient, grace."

At times I may grow weak and feel a bit discouraged.
Knowing that someone, somewhere, can do a better job.
For who am I to serve You?
I know, I don't deserve You.
But that's the part, that burns in my heart, and keeps me hanging on.

And I ask You How many times will You pick me up.
When I keep on letting You down?
And each time I will fall short of Your glory,
How far will forgiveness abound?
And You answer, "My child, I love you,
And as long as you're seeking My face,
You'll walk in the power of My daily sufficient, grace."

And You are so patient with me, Lord.

As I walk with You, I'm learning what Your grace really means.
How all of my transgressions were paid at Calvary.
So instead of trying to repay You, I'm learning to simply obey You.
By giving up my life to You for all that You've given to me.

And I ask You How many times will You pick me up.
When I keep on letting You down?
And each time I will fall short of Your glory,
How far will forgiveness abound?
And You answer, "My child, I love you,
And as long as you're seeking My face,
You'll walk in the power of My daily sufficient, grace."

My daily sufficient, grace.

Cody Allen Williamson - January 16, 1992 - February 3, 2002
I miss you Son